Last Updated on 05/08/2024 by Chris Gampat
“For the most part, the camera did not cause rift, rather it was a gift,” says photographer Dena Elisabeth Eber to the Phoblographer in an interview. “It allowed both of us to see our relationship from the outside. There may have been a time or two when Alex or I had enough of the camera, and I include one such important part of the story in the book.” Alex is the name of her child, who transitioned and is the hero of the story. And in many ways, the two collaborated in the making of You Refused To Believe You Ever Liked Pink.
All images by Dena Elisabeth Eber. Used with permission. More can be found on her website. You Refused to Believe You Ever Liked Pink can be found on Amazon.
Often, with documentary photography, a person sometimes tries to tell an outsider’s perspective. But in the past few years, that practice has been more aligned with photojournalism. Modern documentary photography often has a point of view. In this case, Dena photographed her child — a subject she’s very close to. With a Canon 5D Mk II and a Canon EOS R5, Dena worked to document Alex’s transition process. The result is a set of images that wouldn’t normally be done because of how much intimate knowledge she has of the subject.
“You Refuse to Believe That You Ever Liked Pink started as a way to tell the story of my child’s transition, but because I was so very close to the subject, it grew into our transitions; Margaret to Alex and me from the mother of Margaret to the mother of Alex,” Dena tells us. “Thus, the documentary was a true unfolding of our personal and relational transitions. It was akin to a qualitative case study that included oneself, it started with a question and grew into more.” To put it more into perspective, it’s about unlearning all you knew about someone and starting anew all over again.
Gender transitions are not exactly uncommon these days. Dena is a professor of photography at Bowling Green State University and has probably witnessed a few of these at her job. What’s so different about Dena and Alex’s story is that where it seems that there is pain in the photos, it also seems like it’s manageable. There are also several figurative allusions to the transition process that otherwise might go over one’s head. Within the larger story, however, they all make sense. The images clearly seem like they’re done from a place of genuine, unconditional love. Unfortunately, this is something that humans learn better from animals than we sometimes do from one another. In this case though, the strong parent and child relationship can be seen.
Alex includes text in the book along with Dena. Both used the camera as a way of viewing themselves. “In the end, I truly feel that the camera helped us see and understand our relationship, thus allowing us both to grow into our new roles,” Dena says. “For Alex, it helped with the reformation of self, and for my part, it helped me see the beautiful Alex take form, and mostly, to fall in love with the person Alex was becoming.”
You Refused to Believe You Ever Liked Pink can be found on Amazon. It’s worth the pickup for anyone going through something similar.