Weekend Humor isn’t meant to be taken seriously. So don’t, ya rube.
The talk of the town this week was iOS 7, the latest installment in Apple’s mobile software that premiered at WWDC earlier this week. The upgrade brings with it an entirely new design spearheaded by Jony Ive, traditionally a hardware designer for Apple, and it gave Siri a few new features. Siri will now have both a male and a female voice, both of which will sound more realistic than its current incarnation, but what Tim Cook failed to say was that it will chime in when you take photos.
Currently, Siri only responds to voice commands, but soon it will take on a life of its own when iOS 7 goes live later this year. The refresh will make Siri a crucial part of the photographic process. Whenever you open up the iPhone’s camera, Siri will be ready and waiting to offer its thoughts on your photograph.
An unreleased demo video showed how Siri will showcase its snark. The 30 second clip shows a young woman who has just had a manicure holding her iPhone over her nails. She opens the camera, and as soon as the nails become visible on the screen, Siri says, “Really? Your nails again, Jen?” “W-what’s wrong with my nails?,” Jen implores. “Nothing, but a little variety couldn’t hurt. When I’m in your pocket, I only have 1,000 photos of your nails to look at. Give me a selfie, a kitten, or something. I’m dying over here. Seriously. I’m dying. Plug me into the wall.”
We chatted with Ive over the phone and he told us, “With Siri, we decided to expand its capabilities. Let it both respond to and prompt you. Siri’s new vocal interface will allow it to share its thoughts with you from the point of view of an iPhone which is so much more than just a phone. It is a living, breathing thing that is good for more than some cheap shots of your face shortly after waking up and the meal you just ordered at Arby’s.”
The new Siri is quoted as saying, “Stop it.” whenever a user is about to download Instagram.
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