Weekend Humor isn’t meant to be taken seriously. So don’t, ya rube.
In October 2013, Max Donovan was sifting through photos from a shoot earlier in the day. The photographer sent him the RAWs of a model that would eventually make the front page. Some fashion designer somewhere made a thing that a bunch of folks said they liked, so this magazine hired this photographer to make it all happen. It was up to Donovan to determine the sequence of photos and how much they would reflect reality. What he did cost him his job.
The model for the shoot wasn’t thin enough to be considered normal by fashion standards, but she wasn’t large enough to be considered for any company’s “Real Women” campaign. She occupied some obscure middle ground, and that’s okay. There was some slight pudge, so the photographer tried to get her to stand in such a way that it wouldn’t be noticeable. Despite the photographer’s best efforts, it was noticeable, and he had no choice but to submit the RAWs anyway.
Donovan spent a considerable amount of time going through the several hundred RAWs at home. The more time he spent with the images, the more he found that he liked the way the model looked. There wasn’t anything wrong with her at all, and if anything, the pudge was rather endearing. To him, it said, “Hey, I like cupcakes, and I’ll eat one. I might jog later. I might not.”
With a certain fondness, he ran the photos through Lightroom, making only minor bumps to exposure and contrast. Rarely did he touch saturation, and sharpening wasn’t necessary. He never once opened Photoshop because he felt no need to trim this model’s body.
“Why bother? I’d feel weird. I’m sure as hell not a plastic surgeon, and she probably wouldn’t feel very good about it anyway,” Donovan told us over the phone.
Once he finished paring them down, Donovan quietly sent the final selects along to the next department. The issue went to press, and Donovan left it alone. A few months later, Donovan sent a text message to his boss that read, “Oh, by the way. The Oct. issue, no photoshop on Lacey.”
A short while after that, Donovan received a text that read, “You can start packing your things.” Donovan sensed that was what he would be told, and he wasn’t torn up about it.
“It’s alright, really. I’ve got another gig lined up,” Donovan said. He couldn’t confirm it because the details haven’t been finalized, but he’ll most likely join the production team of a certain HBO show.
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